I recollect someone once saying: a picture is worth a 1000 words

Welcome to texas

I hate the question. What’s you’re favorite horror movie? Because there are to many. BUT! If you were going to strap me down and pound nails into my eyes if I didn’t pick one. I’ll say the answer lies here.

“The film which you are about to see is an account of the tragedy which befell a group of five youths, in particular Sally Hardesty and her invalid brother, Franklin. It is all the more tragic in that they where young, But, had they lived very, very long lives, they could not expected or have wished to see as much of the mad and macabre as they were to see that day. For them an idyllic summer drive became a nightmare. The events of that day were to lead to the discovery of one of the most bizarre crimes in the annals of American history. The Texas Chain Saw Massacre”. [Read by John Larroquette]

So begins one of the…, if not THE, most brilliant exploitation horror films ever made. Starting with one of the best opening credit sequences in horror, this is absolutely producer-director Tobe Hooper’s finest hour with the story written by Kim Henkel. Its intentions are direct and well believed, and with very little blood loss. Though many will swear that it is a gory movie. Ah yes. The power of suggestion.

August 18, 1973, “Grave robbing in Texas is today’s top story” proclaims the radio announcer as we find 5 youth’s whose drive on a idyllic hot summer day in Texas is about to turn into a trip into hell. After a uncomfortable meeting with hitchhiker [Edwin Neal], they run out of gas and the unsuspecting youth’s have a very bad time with a hammer & chainsaw wielding killer in a mask of skin. Especially poor Sally [Marilyn Burns] who under go a torturous night with Leatherface [Gunnar Hansen] and his dysfunctional family of miscreants.

A wonderfully sick, demented and twisted film that’s scary in the fact that this could realistically be happening next door [or maybe even behind this door.] A great scene is where the Pam falls into the room full of feathers and bones and looks up to see a full grown chicken in an undersized bird caged. You just know and she does to that she’s, well, fucked. And the scene where Grandpa is trying to hit Sally over the head with the hammer but can’t quite do it while she’s screaming her freakin’ brains out. That’s the shit man.

It bites, it’s cutting edge, it’s sick, it’s savage, and it’s grizzly and deranged as it displays utter uncompromising madness like no other film I have ever seen and its laced with dark humor. A big piece of which comes with the excellent & very fitting Tobe Hooper & Wayne Bell’s nerve racking sound design/score. This ride into “homicidal madness and psychological terror” is a cult classic of the highest order. I watched it numerous times and still any time I pit it in, it takes me in its grizzly grasp. Originally having working titles “Headcheese” and then “Leatherface” before being released under the above, this is best served in the lateness of the night hour with ice cold beer; coz it’s fricking hot here in Texas.

Notable Dialogue:
“It’s a good knife”….“Hey Grandpa where gonna let you have this one”…. ”We ain’t in no hurry cause you ain’t going nowhere” – The Hitchhiker.
“Grandpa’s the best killer there ever was”. – Old man Sawyer
AAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa……AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaa!!!!! - Sally

Gas up the ole chain saw for Dark Sky Films DVD 2 Disc Ultimate Edition loaded with Xtras:
It comes in an excellent little tin with a stunning Restored, Re-mastered, High Definition Transfer in its proper 1.78:1 Anamorphic Widescreen Enhanced for 16 X 9 TV’s. And it sounds better than ever with a choice of 5.1, 2.0 Stereo Surround or Original Mono Tracks. All of which warrants buying this top of the list favorite one more time; and without a single regret. It’s most defiantly time to relive the mad and the macabre.

Disc One: Commentary with actors Marilyn Burns, Paul A. Partain, Allen Danziger and Art Director Robert A. Burns. Commentary with Director Tobe Hooper, Cinematographer Daniel Peart and Gunnar Hansen. Theatrical Trailers, TV Spots, Radio Spots
Disc Two: Texas Chain Saw Massacre: The Shocking Truth Documentary, Flesh Wounds: Documentary, Tour of the TCSM house with Gunnar Hansen, Deleted Scenes & Outtakes, Blooper Reel, Outtakes from The Shocking Truth and finally a Still Gallery.

Spending the majority of my years here in Texas, hunting down a few locations, like the house where it was filmed just seemed like the right thing to do. Moved from its original location it now sits in Kingsland, TX and is part of The Antlers Hotel. [Sadly they don’t embrace the history] We semi-toured the house when it was the now closed Four Bears Restaurant, where my wife and I stayed in one of three train cars refurbished into cozy cabin/ bed & breakfast like place that are next to the house.

Like the man says. “Grave robbing in Texas is today’s top story”.

We also visited the site of the opening scene, minus the corpse. You can find the Bagdad Cemetery just outside of Austin on Route 278 in Leander, TX. But be wary and remember the words of old man Sawyer. “I told you boys to stay away from that grave yard”.

When trolling the back roads of Texas looking for graveyards and old murder houses, it’s a good idea to keep the ole gas tank full. Don’t be an out of gas story gone bad.

Why not stop at the Ryan Hills Prairie Grocery Gas Station on Highway 304 in Bastrop, TX. They got some good bar-b-que. At least that’s what an attendant said while some weird guy washed my windshield. Actually it was closed when we were there. Note: I see that it has recently been changed to Bilbo’s Texas Landmark.